Now that there’s a new robot on Mars, it won’t be long before the false reports of life start to circulate the Internet again. In fact the folderol started today with this tantalizing headline on Drudge: “LIFE ON MARS?”

A question headline on a story with inconclusive findings is a great way to get readers to click. But in this case, it’s just a blatant trick, since there are no findings whatsoever. In fact, this robot isn’t even looking for life. (For the record, here’s the story it linked to.)

The Phoenix Mars Lander, which touched down in the polar region of the red planet Sunday, is not set up to find life. It is designed to look for conditions that might once have supported life (which means, basically, liquid water). Sorry if you were hoping for more, but NASA works in incremental ways.

Meantime, as the craft beams back new images of terrain we’ve never seen up close before, let me make a prediction: There will be a rock that looks like something resembling a life form [like, maybe, a woman? or a huge man's face? or maybe a bunny?] or at least a part from an alien spacecraft or other suspicious artifact. I could be wrong, but history tells us this is a pretty safe bet. And when it happens, don’t believe the related hooey about NASA covering it all up because they don’t want us knowing about the other civilizations out there. NASA has some talented and dedicated PR people, but nobody could keep a lid on that one.